1. Camryn Manheim playing the worst role of her career on Criminal Minds. What happened to that whole praying-mantis-girlfriend thing? Wherefrom sprang Mama Horrible?

2. Alexis‘s papaya-steak boyfriend. Are things so bad, Castle scriptwriters, that you had to steal Canvas from Anger Management?

3. The Mother. Seriously, people, the person Ted has been waiting to meet for eight seasons is Brunette Lily?

4. The kid who got shot in Uganda so that Maggie could change her hairstyle and have one-night stands and become a Serious Reporter.

5. Kelty. Why, MasterChef, why?